Homophobia
by Ms. Wolf
Summary: After confessing his life long secret to his best friend, Sasuke learns the meaning of homophobic, loneliness and utter bliss. Naruto on the other hand, learns that sometimes its better to stop fighting, accept the future and adapt to change.
1. Chapter 1

**Title name|** Homophobia

**Summary|** Sasuke never imagined how people reacted to homosexuals, nor did he imagine Naruto and his friends as homophobes.

**Pairing| **Naruto-Sasuke

**Rated| **M (Mature content) for very foul language and inappropriate scenes in later chapters.

**Author Note| **

_Hello doves;_

_I guess an apology is in order. firstly because I have used a few characters in my story and made them completely closed-minded and a bit of (ahem…) assholes. Secondly, Sasuke and everyone else are extremely OOC so go easy on me please and thirdly I am sorry for the foul language, I have no idea of what got into me while writing this, but now I just can't bring myself to take them out._

_Also, I have to clarify this story is titled __homophobia__, because __IT IS__ the theme of the story and __NOT __because I'm homophobic. Come on people think about it, if I was homophobic I wouldn't have made a pairing with Naruto and Sasuke, right?_

_Lastly, the story is NaruSasu and it will contains lemon(s), know what this means? It means this story contains homosexuality, explicit scenes and blah, blah, blah… So if you don't like it, don't waste your time on it and DON'T READ IT, other than that, Enjoy!_

_-XO Ms. Wolf_

|_Naruto and all characters are property of Masashi Kishimoto|_

**Homophobia**

"_Homosexuality is found in over 450 species. Homophobia is only found in one."_

**Chapter 1**

The pressure in the air was getting worse. I could tell I was sweating, avoiding eye contact with everyone and feeling uncomfortable as hell. The reason of why I accepted Sakura's invitation in the first place was a blurry moment in my mind, but I knew I had to leave now.

"Hey Sasuke… Do you feel ok? Cause you look like shit man." Shikamaru was right I felt even worse than shit, but then again why wouldn't I. The last half hour in the bar had been spent talking of just how freaky and filthy homosexuals were. Apparently, I was the only one in the group who thought homosexuality was perfectly normal.

Kiba, who was now clearly drunk, had been talking the last five minutes of his encounter with a homosexual and how he was _harassed _by him, in all sincerity I had stopped listening when he said: _"…then that stupid fag tried to kiss me! I was about to…"_ I didn't need to hear it; I could see it in most of their faces, the way they would react if a homo tried to even touch them, I could see their gestures as they turned into pure disgust when they imagined the situation.

"Eww… that's disgusting!" Ino practically yelled. Kiba had probably said something that made her shudder, because her expression was pretty clear. Her face showed pretty clearly she had just imagined the worst scenario of her freaking life.

If I had been asked before this, I would've said my teammates were open-minded and understanding people, in fact, I was a few days close to actually telling someone about myself, but now there was no fucking way I was going to do it, as it turns out everyone in the table was homophobic.

"You know Shikamaru you're right, I don't feel so good, I'd better leave. I'll see you guys tomorrow." I wasn't willing to stay any minute longer, it hurt to hear my so called friends talking like that, insulting my very essence, but what hurt me the most was that Naruto was one among them.

"Hold on teme, I'm leaving too." Oh fuck no! I was practically on the verge of screaming. Everything I wanted at this point was being away from that bastard and his fucking friends. I wanted to get home in a peaceful silence, but knowing Naruto, that was not going to happen, not today.

On the way home Naruto kept babbling about god-knows-what. _Kami, he never shuts up!_ To be perfectly honest it got to the point where I was looking for something to shove up his mouth to make him quiet. That thought my mnd drift into the things I could shove up his pretty little mouth… After all, I did have this one _thing_, but the reality hit me again and I realized that at the moment I was completely mad so there was no point in even trying to imagine.

"Hey Sasuke, did you know that Gaara might be gay?" I had also heard the rumors, many of us had, but I never paid them attention, after all I thought '_Who would give shit? It's the Kazekage.'_ Now on the other hand, I had seen that people turned out to be a little more responsive to those types of differences.

"So! Does it fucking bother you?" I asked. Yes, I was pissed and no, I really didn't want to hear the answer to the question, but I was curious. I wanted to know what Naruto thought of him, what he thought of _us._

"Whoa! Chill Sasuke, I was only saying and no, it doesn't bother me, well… at least if he doesn't try anything on me or anyone for that matter, I mean _you_ have seen it Sasuke, it's disgusting." Yup, that's exactly what I feared. I had confirmed Naruto was straight since the time I returned to the village and he blabbered on and on about all of his different girls and their so many talents, but I didn't know he thought of homosexuals as disgusting, whats even worse, I didn't know how to react to his response .

I refused to speak after that, I had nothing to say. I was what many would call devastated. I liked Naruto for a long time, I had known the bastard wasn't gay and I knew he would never feel an attraction for me even if he was, but to know that he found me disgusting, now that was simply cruel.

Naruto as always didn't seem to notice my feelings and kept talking as if nothing had happened, god knows what he was talking about because I was paying no attention, in fact all of my attention was focused on not letting one tear fall in front of that bastard. Once we close to my home I walked past him towards the door, I didn't invite him in as always, in fact I didn't even say goodbye and as soon as I closed the door, tears started streaming down my face.

"_Fuck…"_


	2. Chapter 2

**|Author Note| **

_Hello dearest readers;_

_I just want to thank you all.  
><em>

_On with the story._

_-XO Ms. Wolf_

|_Naruto and all characters are property of Masashi Kishimoto|_

**Chapter 2**

I was pissed. The room, heck! the whole house smelled like a combination of ramen and feet, sweaty dirty feet. To top it all, it was about four in the evening and I was starving. Yes, there were piles of food on the table, but I was not going to eat anything in that room or the whole house for that matter.

The day had gone and started out like shit and now it was beginning to get worse.

Imagine spending a whole day with that homophobic son of a _(his lovely mother may rest in peace)_!

It took me four days, _four freaking days!_ to get over the stupid words that the stupid Naruto had stupidly said and now here I was in the dragon's den again like the stupid idiot I am.

"So… what do you want to do Sasuke?" It had been about three weeks that Naruto and I hadn't been together (_as friends_) alone. Today, Naruto thought it was a good idea to drag me to his lame excuse of a house and spend an afternoon together, and as exciting as that sounded… it wasn't.

"I told you already, I want to leave." I was still holding a grudge and I wasn't in the mood for anything, especially since this morning when an anbu showed up at my door telling me that my mission was canceled by orders of the Hokage, now that was bullshit. Behind the Anbu of course came Naruto grinning and this nightmare began.

"Ah come on Sasuke! We have a complete day for ourselves and the training grounds are occupied so we can act like civilians today, lets do stupid civilian stuff!" Naruto was happy. I could say that because if his stupid grin didn't show it, the whole golden aura around him surely did. It was in moments like this when I questioned my sanity and wondered why on earth would I be attracted to such a big idiot like himself.

"Naruto… you always act like a civilian AND stupid for Kami's sake! cant you act smart for one day?." The words bounced of Naruto like nothing, the stupid idiot kept on grinning.

After a few seconds his face lit up like a fucking light bulb and he marched straight to the kitchen where he began to clatter around searching for something for what seemed like forever, it got to the point where I was worried for his kitchen, but finally he came back with two dusty bottles of cheap sake.

"Drink up Sasuke." He said as he handed me a bottle.

Its quite embarrassing for me to admit I accepted the sake offer. After all, I had my motives, it had been a while since the last time I had some and I was going through some stuff, so why not? It wasn't a crime.

It wasn't until my second and a half bottle when I realized I was drunk, not completely wasted, but drunk. I began fiddling with my fingers to see which of my senses were blurred by alcohol.

"You know Sasuke I've been thinking…" His words were slurred and full of spit.

I laughed. Hard. "You… think?" By this point I was lost. I was in Naruto's living room, having a good time, slouching in the sofa with him practically leaning on my back and actually listening to him.

"Yeah sometimes I do, now listen. I've been thinking… we need to find you a girl, you know, so you can get laid." Ok, that was a blow and abrupt crash into reality.

"No." I knew where this conversation would lead, I mean, I was drunk, but I wasn't stupid.

"Why not? Have you gotten laid before?" I wanted to tell him, to finally let go but I was afraid of how the answer to his question would make him react. This was after all _Naruto._

"No and stop saying 'laid' it sounds vulgar." My heartbeat had increased, I was starting to panic and I chugged the rest of the sake for courage.

"Ah come on Sasuke, see this is why you need to get laid! So you can enjoy life more. Sex is awesome, you at least have to try it once. In fact if you let me, I can have a girl here in less than twenty minutes." He was determined. Ever since Naruto started having sex regularly he thought it was the best thing in the world and had turned into quite the ladies man, I could care less about the sluts that hovered over him every night, but sheesh! some self respect at least. Naruto didn't have the decency _OR_ brains to remember any girl's name and yet they would be back every day.

"No thank you, unlike you I have decency." It wasn't a lie, I wasn't going to go around sleeping with everything I could fit in, I was determined to wait for something good and a guy at that.

"Come on Sasuke! why not? If you don't give me a good reason in less than five seconds, I'll call her." He held the phone threatening to press dial. Well he asked for it.

"Because I don't like girls." He froze, stupid expression in place, still holding the phone, his finger hovering over dial and after a good twenty seconds he smirked.

"Yeah right, Sasuke Uchiha doesn't like girls... Good one!" And he pressed dial.

So I jumped on him, closed the phone and looked straight into his eyes

"Naruto… I'm gay."


	3. Chapter 3

|_Naruto and all characters are property of Masashi Kishimoto|_

**Chapter 3**

_'Knock, knock…'_

"Fuck!" I had not gotten any rest through the night, it had been at least six hours since I had gotten back from the last mission and I was exhausted, not just physically, but mentally too.

_'Knock, knock…'_

Turns out, Naruto's reaction was a little bit more over the top than what I expected. He had stopped talking to me… literally. He avoided me and if needed, stood as far away as he could unless we were on missions of course. I firmly believe that he tried convincing Tsunade into either making me leave the team or letting him join another, because every morning before missions she would call us in and reminded us how important is that we accept and trust each other and if something were to happen to one of us for not cooperating she would rip our heds off and put them on a spear for decoration.

The rest of the team appeared as oblivious as ever. Kakashi saw nothing of it, even though I was pretty sure he knew exactly what was going on and Sakura found it charming that she and I had more space without Naruto barging in, but I was pretty sure she knew something too. The only one who appeared to have a clue was Sai, who often questioned Narutos raging breath every time I talked.

This was every mission since the, and it began getting the best of me.

_Knock, knock…_

Now… it was four in the morning and somebody kept on knocking on the fucking door nonstop.

"I'm fucking coming!"

I couldn't help feeling like crap, these past few days were taking a toll on me. It wasn't that I couldn't handle being alone, or the fact that Naruto had the nerve of telling half of the village I was gay. I wasn't embarrassed. It was just that the one thing I ever took for granted started to collapse on me. Naruto was walking away faster than ever and I wouldn't stop him. How could I?

He had been avoiding me for me for the entire week, I had managed to get glimpses of him on the street, but he always ran away. We had to interacted only for the sake of a mission and he crossed words with me like if I was nothing more than a mere rock. I guess I have to admit it hurts me because he was my best friend. Since that day, I have found myself slowly sinking into depression, I've been feeling more explosive and lately I just want to go away.

With those thoughts in mind, I opened the door.

"Well good morning Uchiha!" Oh fucking great! Of all the people in the whole fucking world, here was the one I would happily live without seeing one more time.

"What do you want Genma?" It had been around two or three years since Genma and I had actually crossed words, but I hated him anyway. I was not happy to see his stupid face this early in the morning.

"Aren't you going to invite me in? Seems like a lack of hospitality to me Sasuke." He grinned as he stepped further. Something wasn't right.

"No, now tell me what do you need or you can fucking leave." This was getting awkward and I was in no mood for awkward, or awake.

He stared, with a smirk plastered on his stupid face. I was about to shut the door in his face when he spoke...

"Strong words for a _cunt_, don't' you think Uchiha?" It had taken long enough for the insults to start coming. I had expected them at the beginning of this week when I realized Naruto had spread the word, it kind of surprised me that no one actually showed any interest in offending me in public.

Tsunade, who was well aware of the issue ay hand had warned me:

"_Look Uchiha do whatever you want with that ass of yours, it ain't my problem, but let me tell you there are people who are just stupid enough to insult you and your decisions… I'm telling you this because I don't want a single dead body on behalf of your 'sexuality' so please… control yourself."  
><em>The bitch knew nothing of what she talked about, and I was pretty sure she was disgusted by me. Nonetheless I saw her point valid.

So I took a deep breath and smiled.

"Well you see Genma... Fuck you." and I showed him my pretty little finger. "Now if this is all you came here for, either you beat it or I'll have to oblige myself to beat the shit out of you this early in the morning." Manners, It's all about manners.

"Calm down you homo, I was just here to tell you that the _faggot-kage_ wants to have a word with you, he's waiting in the Hokage tower. Oh and…"He kissed me. His tounge ran across my lips and before I could push him away he took off leaving me standing there, more humiliated than I have ever been in my entire life with a bit more than a dozen questions in my head.

I intended to chase after him, maybe even slaughter him, but no, I had some other matters in my hand and besides I had just found out that the jackass _ladies-man_ Genma was probably gay.

As pissed off as I was I couldn't help wonder which kage wanted to see me and most of all why. So without any more delay I headed out to the Hokage tower, ignoring the fact that I was in sleep clothes and anywhere near presentable.

_This better be good…_


	4. Chapter 4

|_Naruto and all characters are property of Masashi Kishimoto|_

**Chapter 4**

The wooden floors screeched as I walked through the hallways of the Hokage tower. It was still dark outside and it was awkwardly silent. I began to wonder if there was actually someone around or If Genma had made the whole story up. but as I got closer I began to hear Tsunade's deep laughter. I began to worry.

I knocked.

"COME IN UCHIHA!" Sometimes I wondered if maybe Tsunade was supposed to be a man.

As I entered the office, a strong scent of booze, cigar, coffee and hangover immediately attacked my nose, if I could describe the smell in a single word it would be puke. Unluckily for me my stomach was still weak from the bad habits I had been acquiring and at the moment that smell was definitely not helping.

I was not surprised to find Tsunade half-drunk and trying her best to keep her head off her desk, what did seem a little strange was the fact that there was a very amused Gaara sitting not too far from her.

"Good morning Uchiha, glad you could join us!." Tsunade could barely open her eyes, and the words were practically forced from her mouth, but she was trying very hard to look serious so I supposed this ridiculousness had a point to prove. "Straight from bed I see, I've got to say you look simply adorable in those pajamas who would've thought red was your color…" I looked down to see myself in very red pajamas, my face burned with embarrassment. "Anyway let me get to the point, as _you can see_, we have the honor to have a visit of the Kazekage himself, after talking for while he has decided to stay a few days here in Konoha to solve a few issues and of course strengthen the bond between Konoha and Suna." She didn't seem to continue and I suppose I should see a hint in there somewhere but I didn't understand why I was here.

"Ok… but why was _I _called here?" I knew they hadn't been actually_ 'talking'_ and the Kazekage couldn't leave his village just like that. I came to the conclusion that this was either a very important matter or a very stupid one. I begged for the former because somehow I felt I was getting involved.

"Well, since all your missions for the next two weeks have been canceled due to lack of teamwork and intolerance you get to have the privilege of escorting the Kazekage everywhere, that is until all businesses are settled." Oh just fucking awesome! Two weeks? What the fuck? Why the hell was I going through this, it had all been Naruto's fault, _he _was the one not working in team, _he_ was the one with no tolerance and I'm the one paying for it?

"Why me? Naruto is free too! And Shikamaru certainly likes dragging his sister all over town, maybe he would do that with Gaara too!" I was too much on the edge to be able to take this. No missions. No leaving town, maybe there was a suicidal form included?

She didn't speak, no one did, but she looked at me straight in the eye and I knew I had no escape.

"Yes Tsunade-sama." Her word was my command. Gaara didn't say anything about the incident and never did, I wondered if he felt insulted at that point, maybe I should've kept quiet, sometimes I reminded myself of Naruto, goes to show how much time we had actually spent together.

"You may leave for now, but do come pick the Kazekage up in an hour or so… we still have things to talk about." Talk my ass… they were going to keep on drinking, that stupid old hag and her stupid errands. Why the hell couldn't she just call on one of her assistants if the Kazekage needed a tour guide?

"Yes _Tsunade-sama_." _...your wish is my command_. Bitch!

I was about to close the door behind me when I turned to look back. To be perfectly honest it scared the shit out of me. I had never seen Gaara so expressive since this morning, the amused smile he was wearing was a bit strange, but to actually wink at me, now that was just plain scary, maybe the lack of sleep was affecting me.

"Not that I don't love the red pajamas you're wearing Sasuke, but you might want to consider changing into something more appropriate before coming back." Tsunade burst out laughing.

_That bastard! talk about denigrated…_


	5. Chapter 5

|_Naruto and all characters are property of Masashi Kishimoto|_

**Chapter 5**

The streets were filled with people. Children were running and playing everywhere, civilians were shopping and a few ninjas supervised the whole area or pretended to at least, everything just seemed so normal, so every day.

The sky was barely rising up in the sky and the freshness of the morning air could be felt strongly in the tip of every nose. Birds sang harmonious melodies that entered peacefully in ones ears, but at the time and with my current temper there was nothing more that I wanted to do, but kill them, all of them. The birds the ninjas the civilians, and I'll refrain my mind from the children.

My head was aching badly, I have had no time to sleep, no time to eat, not that I was hungry anymore anyway, my ninja clothing was cold and humid, lastly I was tired, very very tired, but it didn't matter because here I was escorting the Kazekage to his 'Business meeting' …again.

This stupid assignment was getting on my nerve. I'm pretty sure I made clear the fact that I am not a people person, and I'm definitely not an escort or a babysitter, especially not to the most powerful ninja of the village of sand. I mean, why the fuck did he even _need _an escort? No one would be foolish enough to attack him in here and if anyone did, he could very much fend for himself!

It had been three fucking days and I was already losing it, one would think the Kazekage is an easy person to deal with, wrong. Apparently he had meetings with EVERYONE, ALL DAY, EVERYWHERE and of course every place _he_ went to, _I_ went to too. Just my fucking luck.

Lately I was beginning to fantasize finding him dead in his apartment or something along those lines. It was understandable though, I mean it was unfair enough I had to be woken up at six in the morning just so I could get Gaara to a decent breakfast, it was unfair _I _was the only one paying, but on top of that just yesterday I heard Tsunade congratulating Naruto on a successful mission… bitch! He shouldn't be getting missions either! He had blame in this too! Of course the bastard didn't even look at me when he passed by and I wasn't sure which of all the reasons I had was the one acting up right now that I wanted to kill him at the time, but I do remember it hurt. It hurt so bad I hadn't had the chance to sleep for more than one hour straight due to my misery in the whole week and when I was getting close to doing so, when I was finally getting my deserved rest… Gaara showed up.

It was not that I didn't like him. He was in fact a very simple person, silent and very undemanding the type of person that in other situations I wouldn't mind their presence, but for crying out loud! Couldn't he walk by himself to the Hokage tower?

"So I see your temper is finally on the edge Uchiha. One would think that after a few days you would get the hang of it." I was a bit surprised, Gaara rarely talked, especially while on the street.

There was a hint of amusement to Gaara's voice. I knew I had been clearly obvious with my feelings about this assignment and I did expect Gaara to realize it, but I thought that by this point he would've asked for a change or maybe, at least, have the shit kicked out of me.

"Well, I'm very sorry if my temper bothers you Kazekage, but with all due respect I have no idea why I'm the one paying for another one's behavior." It was rude, but nonetheless it was the truth, I mean Naruto didn't have a stupid escort assignment like mine, no, he was still out on 'B' ranked missions getting himself congratulated, while I was stuck here with this weirdo.

"You're not _paying_ for anything Uchiha, if you're my escort it's because I asked for you personally and not because Tsunade assigned you." ..;_the fuck? _This _had_ to be a fucking joke.

"…why?" I was well aware we shared some sort of past if you can consider it that and yes, I was strong, but somehow… it just wasn't the reason.

"Uchiha, you and I have more things in common than what you think. You and I have been struggling for a long time…" I was almost certain he was talking about the loss of our families.

"I have no reason to struggle." I knew it was my pride talking, I knew I had issues, maybe not family issues, but issues anyway and I definitely wanted to talk, even if it were just a bit, but something deep inside me just didn't allow it. Some people call it pride.

"Oh really? Alright then let me ask you this: 'how does it feel losing your best friend because you're gay?"

That was a low blow.

I couldn't respond, I just couldn't. What _could_ I say? So I preferred to stay silent, knowing that stupid bitter pain and roaring anger were about to burn inside me.

"Come, let's have some tea. I think its time you and I talk privately."

_Just great…_


	6. Chapter 6

|_Naruto and all characters are property of Masashi Kishimoto|_

**Chapter 6**

It was raining.

_Stupid rain…_

I was wet.

_Stupid tears_

Have you ever felt it? When everything seems to be against you? When you feel even worse than shit because you are who you are? When your happiness will never be yours because it's in the hands of another fucking person? When you have given up _everything_ for that person who gives shit about you?!

Have you ever felt like me? A stupid guy with no one left to cry with, a guy with no dreams and no sense in life and absolutely _NOTHING_ left to live for.

Well… I give up. I can't do this anymore.

_(Earlier)_

'_Stupid Gaara and his stupid pep talk, stupid fucking confession, fuck him, fuck everyone! How dare he! He has no right to decide who I'll want or what I'll do!'_

The whole evening had been nothing more than a carousel of emotions and stories of tragedies. Pathetic!

Gaara had ditched his normal "schedule" to, as he put it, have a _'chat'_ with me. It was pure nonsense, he had me listening for over an hour of how he had accepted his sexual orientation, how he overcame his problems once the village knew he was homosexual, ha! well at least I got that cleared out, but for crying out loud of course people respected him, he is the fucking Kazekage and used to be a fucking jinchuriki, even I respected him!

I think he wast trying to bond with me, but I couldn't identify myself with him. How could I? He still had a family who loved him for who he was, a village who accepted him no matter if he banged guys, he hadn't been stabbed in the back by his best friend. He didn't know what being alone and rejected really meant.

Eventually he asked me to evaluate if Naruto was really what I wanted. He blatantly called me childish, because according to him, I was chasing something I knew I couldn't have, someone that just wasn't made for me. He implied I did it for the chase. For fucks sake! If I was in it for the thrill of the chase I'd have a better rejection off Neji!

I have my reasons of why I want Naruto and to be honest, I don't really care right now. I don't want him to fall under some stupid spell and love me. All I want form Naruto now is for him to accept who I am. I want my best friend back.

He asked for me to move on, to leave Naruto behind, as he once did. I wondered if he once had feelings for Naruto, just like I do now.

Later before we left the tea house, something even worse came up:

_"It has been a pleasure to spend the evening with you Sasuke; I hope my words served of something, anything. Anyway, I might as well tell you that tomorrow you shall be relieved of your duty with me. I will be parting at dawn, but before I leave… I would like to ask you to come with me to Suna, to let time heal your wounds. Think about it, its an opportunity for you not to be afraid of who you are. Maybe get to know more people like us? Really think about it. Well, I wont need your escorting today anymore, but I'll be at the Konoha entrance at sunrise tomorrow."_

And he left.

It was in the afternoon when the skies began to fall in the shape of raindrops, leaving the streets empty and tiny rivers on the streets.  
>I've always hated rain. So many deaths happen when it rains. So many tragedies and tears are associated with rain... Itachi died in the rain.<p>

I was still in the park where I spent the most part of the afternoon, still thinking. Wondering if the path I had taken was indeed the best. Sometimes I wish I had never returned, sometimes I believe it was better when he was just another obstacle in my way…

Rain kept pouring, pouring one me, pouring on the shoes of the person standing in front of me.

"…hey"

My heart stopped.

"Listen, there's something I need to tell you…"

He waited for a response, one that didn't come, but he continued anyway.

"I'm sorry. I really am, you must think I'm some kind of a jerk and you know what? maybe I am, but you have to see this from a different point Sasuke, from my point of view." I dind't have the courage to look at him and I didn't want to hear him either, because I knew he would only make it worse.

"..Shut up." He ignored me.

"No, let me finish… I can't pretend I like your decision, because I don't and I can't pretend to give you my support, because I won't. I'm sorry, but I can't, no, _I won't_ wreck my own life for a stupid decision you made. Sasuke I have my life figured out, theres a bright future in front of me, one I've always wished for and you're ruining it for me. So I wont stay by your side and I'm sorry if this seems shallow but I have no other option. If you ever go back to the Sasuke I knew, come and talk to me…"

With that, he kept walking and the rain kept on coming, allowing me to cry along with it and hide these pathetic tears.

_I wish I could die. I wish I would just disappear…_

Then, it hit me… I can disappear.


	7. Chapter 7

|_Naruto and all characters are property of Masashi Kishimoto|_

**Chapter 7**

I felt tired and cold, laying on the floor, thinking just how pathetic I turned out to be. The mighty Uchiha had been reduced to a single homo-crying pathetic excuse of a man. Now that was fucking disappointing.

I saw the first rays of the sun finally filter through the clouds and my window, landing right beside me filling my room with a soft and warm orange glow. I grew anxious, scared even to see the sun rising. I hadn't slept all night, I couldn't. I had spent the entire night waiting, waiting for someone or something that could stop me from leaving the village before it was too late, but nobody showed up and now there were only minutes left for me to be gone.

It was funny really; I found it hard not to laugh, despite the tears. Last time I left nobody wanted me to leave. Hell, that idiot joined a search party with the only purpose of returning me to the village, Sakura cried and pleaded for me not to go, I even had to knock her out so she could keep quiet and now… Well now it was a different story. Right now, nobody would care if I did.

_Where were those friends now?_

I guess I could say I deserved it, for everything I had done to them, but then again, I had never made empty promises like they did…

I had gathered my things and headed to the Hokage tower to inform Tsunade about my departure. I knew she'd accept anyway. After Gaara's offer I finally realized it was Tsunade's idea to get me to go to Sand, that's why Gaara was here, to convince me. Funny right? Not even the almighty Hokage wanted me in her village, well fuck her!

As I walked down the streets, memories raced through my mind, the type of memories that never vanish. Memories made just a few months ago before I returned.

"_Sasuke please, I'm begging you come back with me. Come back home." The tears in his cerulean eyes hurt me more than what he thought. They made me feel miserable and just pathetic._

_He had come so far for me, after many gave up. He still believed in me, even when everyone else had lost hope. He was still here, hurting and pleading for me to return. Even when I stopped believing in myself._

Apparently the Hokage was already waiting for me, Kakashi was there too.

"Ah! Uchiha and here I was telling Kakashi you wouldn't show up. I'm glad you could make it." Her stupid grin somehow made me want to leave as fast as possible. Kakashi's presence still had me somewhat interested though.

"Quit the bullshit Tsunade, just throw me out already." I spat. I was sick of people pretending they were glad to see me. I wanted this nightmare to be over, I wanted to feel numb.

"…" _Silence. _Uh-oh… Before I could even blink, one of Tsunade's fists made contact with my cheekbone. I was thrown to the opposite side of the room.

"You use those words in front of me again Uchiha and I'll make sure you don't have a brain to come up with them anymore! Now listen!" _Fuck that hurt… _"I'm not sending you to sand because I want to get rid of you, you brat. I'm sending you, because I want to help you…" Kakashi coughed "Oh right._ WE_ want to help you." Help me? Help _me? Fuck! _It got me pissed to realize that every fucking person in this village thought I _needed_ help, because to them, I had a fucking problem!

"Look _Hokage_, I don't need help! I'm not sick! And I certain-"

"Sasuke, shut up." Kakashi finally spoke up. "As lady Tsunade said, we want to help you, but not the way you think. We know you lost Naruto and we know it's because of his major stupidity. We've all been staying away from you with the only hope and purpose of giving Naruto the room to talk to you. Believe it or not, a lot of us still care about you and I'm sorry we left you alone these past few days, but we believed it would help, apparently it didn't."_...you think? _"We want you to leave with Gaara because he has been through this, he can give you advice and well, even make you company. Besides being in a village where homosexuality is highly tolerated will do you good. Now don't take this the wrong way, we are not telling you to leave and never come back, in fact, don't do it because I'll go and get you myself. What we want is that you leave for maybe a couple of months, relax, heal and then come back home."

They proceeded to explain the benefits of my departure and convinced me enough to leave the office without insulting anyone or denigrating myself with more tears.

So it was decided then, I would leave with Gaara for the time being and maybe after some time, I could come back…

"Come Sasuke, the journey is long."

_Good bye Naruto._


	8. Chapter 8

**|Author Note|**

_Hi guys;  
><span>POV Change!<br>Enjoy!  
>-Ms. Wolf<em>

|_Naruto and all characters are property of Masashi Kishimoto|_

**Chapter 8**

The day was going perfect. Blue cloudless skies, warm radiant sun, ramen for breakfast and even the milk tasted wonderful! It had been ages since I felt this great, I was still debating that i was either because last night's party was awesome and I do mean awesome or maybe because of that girl from last night, she certainly knew what she was doing and man she was fast at it… '_What was her name again? Na… Natsumi? Naoko? Well… whatever, it was great!' _Or it could also be because today I finally began with paperwork training.

Hell fucking yes! I was going to be Hokage, there was no doubt about it now, the old hag had said it herself, so it couldn't be changed. She said the harder I work, the quicker I become Hokage. There was nothing in this world that could go wrong today, although I wasn't sure what exactly _paperwork training _meant_…  
><em>

The sun shone brightly as I walked to the tower, surely it felt the same enthusiasm I did. As I gazed at the faces of the past Hokages I realized, that I deserved to be up there, near my father, near the people who gave their lives to protect this village. I was ready to become the Hokage!

As I entered the Tsunade's office, I wondered how Gaara must've felt the first time he became Kazekage, the sense of pride, the happiness, looking at the office that was finally yours, looking at the town that you control!… Hmm knowing the heartless bastard he probably thought of it as a nuisance. Speaking of which, I had heard rumors he was in town, but never saw him.

"Ah Naruto-kun, I've been waiting for you." Shizune said as she stepped out of the storage room, wait… only Shizune?

"Where's the old hag Shizune?" If she wasn't here it meant no training for me, no training for me meant more time, more time meant patience. I don't have patience…

"Umm Tsunade-sama had an important meeting to attend to, but she told me to give you this-" she handed me at least two feet of stacked folders "-These are the assignments that need to be classified and the issues the Hokage must attend, you must organize them in order, that is from most important, to least important. The ones that need immediate attention, you will place in this file here-" she handed me a red folder. "The least important ones you can store in those boxes-" She pointed at some boxes near the desk. " and the ones which require over 500.000 yen you will save for analysis, so you can leave them on the desk." Her face was as calm as ever, meaning this was no joke.

"What about my training?" I was supposed to be training not acting as a second assistant.

"This _is_ your training Naruto." Oh fuck no! This was just doing that lazy old bitch's job. She already had Shizune to do that.

"Aren't _you_ supposed to do this?" Shizune as her personal slave should be the second in charge of this.

"I'm sorry Naruto-kun Tsunade gave me the day off so you could work in peace, this is the only thing Tsunade-sama told me to do. I will take my leave now; Tsunade-sama will be back in an hour or so and you should be half way by then." With that, she took her leave. She left. She left me here to die… Bitch.

Fine! I was decided to show Tsunade I could do even a better job than her personal servant. Well, at least I got to sit in her chair.

Folder 1:

_Repair of Konoha's public Library_

_It has been pointed out to us that, the now 87 year old public library has a great amount of defects that need to be corrected right away. As you may know the library is the only source of knowledge for both our civil and shinobi elementary schools, without them it would be extremely difficult for our student to progress in the theoretical area of whichever his or her studies may be._

_Corrections include:_

_1. Reparation of the east roof area._

_2. Replacement of the broken windows._

_3. …_

_'Blah, blah, blah, etc, etc. This goes in the least-est important. Maybe in the never do folder, kids would be totally happy with that decision, I know I would've been._

_This is really tedious._

_I should've brought some food.'_

Next folder:

_Jounin transfer_

_As of June 7 of the current year the jounin Sasuke Uchiha, by agreements of the Hokage and Kazekage himself, has been transferred to Suna. He will be under Konaha's law and supervision for the first four weeks starting tomorrow and will be granted permanent stay after the first month is completed. If he wishes and is granted permanent stay from the Kazekage, he will then be out of Konoha's jurisdiction and will not be allowed back to Konoha as a resident. It is important that you reconsider this, for Sasuke Uchiha is the last Uchiha clan member, not just in Konoha but everywhere as we know._

_Suna has revised his record and is aware the jounin was indeed a rouge ninja for a…_

_'Sasuke… Suna… Permanent…_

Sasuke…'

"SASUKE!"


	9. Chapter 9

|_Naruto and all characters are property of Masashi Kishimoto|_

**Chapter 9**

You know that moment when you're drinking and you haven't been paying attention to how much you've had and all of a sudden it hits you: you're drunk. Everything seems to move slower and nothing makes sense. Well I wasn't drunk, but finally it hit me and nothing made sense, it was all a blur. What the fuck was happening? All I knew was that I was mad, and I mean mad as hell.

"That dickhead asshole! After all the shit I went through just to get him back and now he just leaves! Like fuck he is… I don't care if I bring him dead, he's coming back."

"Bring who back?" Tsunade stood at the door. Arms crossed and with the most unamused and bored expression one could have in a situation like this.

I didn't have any time to waste with that treacherous bitch. I turned to the window and leaped towards it, the faster I got moving the better. I felt a pair of hands hold on to my ankle and throw me across the room. My body collided with the wall. Pain rippled all over my bones.

Tsunade looked at me, her face expressionless.

"What the hell Tsunade?! What is your fucking problem?!" My head began pounding, I was so enraged at that moment that Hokage or not, if she lay another finger on me I would scar that pretty face of hers.

"Get back to work Naruto, that paperwork isn't going finish on its own... and fix that wall" She pointed at the cracked wall behind me. Like fuck I was! There was no way I was going to keep on doing that stupid shit and clean up her mess, I needed to go, but I needed to know something before I left.

"Why did you let him go Tsunade?" She knew the years of pure hell we had gone through just to get him back. She was part of bringing him back. Why was she throwing all that effort away?

"That's none of your business." _Ha! Hahaha!.._ The bitterness of those words made me laugh uncontrollably. I laughed so hard my stomach began to hurt and the need to roll on the floor became insane.

"None of my business. None of my business? None of my fucking business Tsunade?!" Fuck her, I didn't need to hear this shit now. I turned towards the window again, aware of her presence and her movement, but she didn't move.

"One step out of this village Naruto and you're done. All your dreams of becoming Hokage go out with you. No more missions, no more training, nothing. Now I suggest you mind your own business and get back to work."

I stopped. She began humming while looking at a folder that was previously on her desk.

"Paperwork turned out to be harder, right Naruto?" She smirked "I know that much cause even _I _have to take short breaks from it. Actually just a couple of days ago while taking a break from paperwork at the park I couldn't help to overhear the conversation you had with Sasuke, what was that you say exactly? Something between the lines of: you would never wreck your life for the Uchiha? Don't tell me you're going back on your word now."

I could feel heat emanating from my body, I was enraged. That eavesdropping old witch won't mind her own fucking business, but she had a good point. I had promised to keep a distance from him. Sasuke could die for all I care. I brought him to the village once. My job was done, right? Whatever he does now, is not something I should care about.

Yet somehow I felt like exploding just because he had left. So I sucked up my pride.

"Alright Tsunade, you're right. I'll mind my business, but at least let me have the rest of the day for myself."

I needed peace.

"Go ahead, just stay in the village."


	10. Chapter 10

|_Naruto and all characters are property of Masashi Kishimoto|_

**Chapter 10**

_Perfect… fucking perfect._

What had started out as an awesome day somehow mutated into a cheap imitation of a depressing one.

My head pounded badly, my body ached and I was frustrated as hell. That's what I believe depression feels like, but I wouldn't go all the way and call it a "depressing day", that would be overrated and lame. I would call it… day-that-went-to-shit. Perfect!

Anyway, I made my way to the old training grounds; good place to be alone, blow off some steam, practice and get my mind out of stupid pointless thoughts. I didn't like the idea of running into someone and beating them up just because, not that they wouldn't deserve it for being in my way, but I had already too much shit on me to handle the complaints that would come with it, so there was no better place than here… Alone.

These areas weren't used for training as much anymore, they had been slowly replaced over the years with more _modern_ facilities, or at least that's what they claimed to be. People usually only came here for sparring (if all the other ones were all being used), for privacy (if you know what I mean) and sometimes even picnics (yes, picnics). Except for training ground 44, that one no one dared to touch.

My destination was the third training ground though. Anyone would say to stay away from what hurts you, but I kept going back to the same memories. Then again I wasn't hurt, I was mad… just mad.

Getting there was a real experience. How can I explain this? It was sort of like finding one of your most treasured childhood books behind a timeworn dresser, although ripped, dirty and old, it still held countless memories and a bit comfort. Embarrassing as it may sound I stopped for a moment to recover my breath and sanity.

The grass was tall now, making the ground barely visible, some trees looked seriously damaged and if I somehow believed in the supernatural I could've sworn there were uneasy spirits haunting this place, but then again I didn't, and those uneasy spirits were just probably my troubled thoughts and old memories… or so I hoped.

Those old days seemed lost now, like a dream one barely remembers. I couldn't understand though… Why can't things go back to how they were before? Why the fuck did everyone keep messing stuff up? Everything had been perfect a few months ago, nothing was going wrong, but one stupid decision made by that stupid son of a bitch ruined everything for me. Is it really so fucking hard to just like girls? Why is it so hard for him to be fucking normal? At least he was _born_ with the opportunity to be fucking normal, and what does he do? He fucks it up, of course.

What had been bothering me for days now was that Sasuke never thought of the consequences of his actions, not when he fled the village with Orochimaru, not when he killed Itachi, not when he joined the Akatsuki, not when he tried to kill Sakura, not any fucking time. He never thought that his actions hurt those who actually worried about him and if he did, he probably didn't care, he never cared for anyone. Especially not now, he never thought about how his decision would affect us… or me. He wasn't thinking of anyone more than himself and that pissed me off more than anything. I was his friend, I was the one who gets the collateral damage and yet, he didn't give a shit when he took that decision.

Well fuck him.

As more thoughts came racing through my mind, my heart began pumping violently and my blood boiled in my veins; my vision became blurred from rage and I started to move between the trees, punching everything that stood in my way, throwing kunai at anything that moved, screaming at the top of my lungs… just letting go. Blowing off steam.

I don't know for how long I kept that up, but when I finally stopped, the moon shined in the pitch black sky and every part of my body ached. My hands were shaking uncontrollably and sweat dripped nonstop from my face. I tried wiping it off, but it keep falling and falling and I couldn't stop it… that's when I realized it was coming from my eyes, and it wasn't sweat.

Tears? Perfect, just fucking perfect.

I didn't remember the last time I cried… I think it was when Ero-sennin passed away. I wondered if this was a way of my brain telling me that Sasuke was considered to be dead now. I couldn't find any other explanation to that void feeling.

"It's sometimes hard to realize that some things are actually more important than what we give them credit to be." There on top of the tree I leaned onto was Kakashi sitting on a branch, face hidden between the pages of his dirty book.

Just when I thought this day couldn't get worse.


	11. Chapter 11

|_Naruto and all characters are property of Masashi Kishimoto|_

**Chapter 11**

Have you ever been on that situation when you want to be mad at someone, and humiliate them so much that they leave crying?  
>I was in that situation right now, I was pissed at Kakashi like I had never been pissed at him in my whole life. the problem was, I was the one being humiliated right now. I was the one crying apparently and no matter how much I hoped for it, I knew Kakashi had seen the tears.<br>So I stood still and waited.  
>"What do you want Kakashi? Are you here to tell me Tsunade drove Sakura out of town too?" I knew Kakashi a little too well to know that he had something to do with Sasuke's leaving, or at least he knew he was leaving before hand and did nothing to stop him.<br>"Not unless the future Hokage wants to send her away too-" His tone of mockery gave me chills and for a second I could see myself punching him right in the jaw. "because you know, we're still not sure if Sakura is lesbian or not. I say you don't take your chances and kick her out today, maybe she'll have a chance of catching up with Sasuke." I could hear his fucking smirk under those words.  
>"So I suppose you think this is somehow my fault? Even though it was you who knew he was leaving but didn't stop him" Kakashi leaped off the tree and stood directly in front of me as relaxed as ever.<br>"Give me one good reason of why I should've stopped him? So he could live here in the misery you created for him? Stop acting like a fucking child Naruto. What happened to you? Do you have any idea of what has been going around you, outside that little bubble you call your life? do you know how many people you have managed to push out of your life in two weeks?"

How dare he?! He might have been my teacher at some point, but now we were no more than equals. He had no right to speak to me like that.

And the anger boiled.

"You know what, fuck you Kakashi, fuck you and all those people that 'walked' out of my life these past days, if I haven't noticed its because I don't need them, like I don't need you."

Kakashi stepped forward "Alright then Naruto, live in your closed minded little world, but do not dare come back running like a little girl when you start crying at night for letting all of them go. They're gone because of you."

So I punched him, right in the jaw, and Kakashi was sent flying towards a tree. A second or two passed before kakashi got up, looking at me.  
>"Hit me again little boy, right here-" he pointed at the other side of his jaw "show me how real pain feels like." I hesitated "Maybe youre ready to accept that it was you who drove sasuke out of town! That it was your stupidity that kept him awake for nights! It was you childish reason that left him without a job because you were scared to show what he was showing for you! You left him alone-" I punched him again and he dared to laugh. "He came back for you! You promised him your friendship! And look at what you gave him!"<br>I was burning in rage. My blood boiled. So I threw a mi fist at Kakashi again, but he grabbed my hand, shoved me against a tree and gripped my neck tightly.  
>"You're an idiot Naruto, think about that tonight. Think about what you did these past two weeks and if you still believe you're not an idiot after all that then maybe I'll let you hit me again." with that he threw me aside and left.<p>

I somehow made it back home completely exhausted, found a bottle and drowned in the sweet taste of sake.


	12. Chapter 12

**Author Note| **

_Hello sweethearts;_

_Sorry its short, but better this than nothing, right?_

|Naruto and all characters are property of Masashi Kishimoto|

**Chapter 12**

_I have done nothing wrong..._

I woke up in the middle of my living room. My head pounded badly, I had bruises all over my arms and I could swear a piece of my hair was gone. My stomach was empty, I don't remember clearly, but it felt like I puked a couple of times before I passed out. I felt like shit. Guilty somehow.

_'Knock, knock..'_

There was no way in hell that I was going to open the door.

_'Knock, knock..'_

_'KNOCK, KNOCK..'_

"NARUTO OPEN FREAKING THE DOOR, I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE!." I recognized that voice.

I rolled over, got up and walked almost blindly to the door and there, stood a pink haired girl looking at me with eyes full of rage and tears.

"Sakura-" She cut me off.

"I could crush every one of your bones right now and leave you half dead, no matter how strong you are Naruto. I could kill you if I tried! But I keep praying to kami that you will start to understand!" She pushed me inside the house and I was starting to think her threat was serious, but I still wasn't sure what this was about.

"Sakura I-" She cut me off again.

"NO! Shut up and listen! Who the hell are you Naruto? What have you become into? You're not that boy with a dream anymore, you're not that dorky little kid that lit up a room just with his smile! you've become a stuck up prick who thinks things for him are just a given, you're just a stupid guy who doesn't know what feelings are! you've even forgotten about your friends and now to make things worse you're pushing everyone away! You don't deserve to be Hokage and if your father could see you right now... he would agree with me."

At the mention of my father rage boiled within me, blood pumped into my fists and I stiffed.

_Breathe..._

"What?! are you going to hit me now? Like you did to Kakashi last night? or are you gonna make me leave like you made Saskue do? Are you going to call me a bitch like you did to Tsunade? Well I'm sorry if I'm not as cute and pleasing as the bimbos you fuck every day! So come on, hit me! Show me how insignificant my frienship is to you!"

I knew she was mad and hurt but Sakura had never talked to me like this before. She was crying at this point. I took a deep breath.

"Sakura I won't hit you, and I never said your friendship was insignificant." She looked histeric, her arms clenched to the chair made her nuckes white and I mentally said goodbye to it.

"OH! Really now? Am I the special one that doesn't get to be pushed away?!"

_Breathe..._

"Why are you doing this Sakura? Why are you here, just to yell at me?" I saw no point in this conversation. She was here for something else, either to hit or make me do something, although lately everyone found it wise to point out my flaws i a very loud way. It was getting in fucking nerves.

"No. I'm here because I want you to go to Suna and apologize to Sasuke so he can comeback."

_Breathe._


End file.
